For Black Queer Womxn Who Have Considered Suicide / When the Rainbow Isn’t Enuf

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RashawndaWilliamsRashawndaWilliams
2 DAYS AGO
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Cherie is an online community of beauty lovers sharing their stories; whether that's their favorite products, makeup tutorials, or skincare routines. Download the app today to be a part of #BeautyWithoutBarriers and show the world what beauty means to you!The sounds of the baptist church choir in my ear. From then created a fear in my chest as the pastor preached. His words strong, like holy water dripping from his tongue. Everyone sitting in the church pew with anticipation as he speaks: “Marriage is a sacred union between a man and a woman.” No room for any other desires to breathe in between the lines. His words ring out once more going on and on about how God created Adam and Eve, Not Adam and Steve. Not Eve and Eva. These were words that kept me in-prisoned in my own mind. From then, I believed there was only one way to love. These were words I have grown to feel suffocated by. Some days I fight these words, Other days they sit inside my body like ash on a wednesday. In this world to be black, queer, and femme can be a death sentence. Being told as black this is your place. Being told as queer, don’t forget about your race! Did you forget who you are? Did you forget that you have to swallow your pride? A rainbow noose hangs around my neck as His story closes up in my throat. The ancestral power of Audre Lorde, Bayard Rustin, and Marsha P. Johnson daring to come out. When will I be seen as one person? Black, Queer, Femme, and beautiful. Used to think some truths were better left buried. Thought so after the day my mother told my gay brother that he had the devil inside him—I guess it’s inside me too. It was after that day I started drowning in a special type of baptism. When will my mother see me? Whole, not broken, not traumatized, not evil. When will she love us unconditionally? A rainbow noose hangs around my neck. How is it that I’ve become trapped so tightly into a different form of lynching ...a rainbow noose hanging from my neck? My freedom trapped in a box, No air and space to breathe anything but the tragic history of homophobia, racism, and patriarchy. Why does the way I choose to love offend you? Are you jealous of this love that is so free? Are you jealous of our blood that bleeds rainbows? Are you afraid to free yourself? A rainbow noose hangs around my neck as I love another black girl after being trapped in a world that is white and straight. Trapped in a world that is black and bible. But if my world must be bible, I want to write a new one. Write scriptures with my fingers and make queer love biblical. Get lost in the Garden of Eden and eat buckets of forbidden fruit. So, Queer family, let's sin over and over. Let’s destroy the old and new testament and make new one. In this one, God is non-binary and uses they/them pronouns.
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MY FACE MAKEUP ROUTINE for when I’m breaking out
MY FACE MAKEUP ROUTINE for when I’m breaking out
For numerous reasons, I have been stressed lately which really shows on my skin. I already get the occasional breakout, around the time of the month, and sometimes from diet and eating food that probably isn’t GREAT for me. So with additional stress I eat more, crave more crappy food, maybe pick at my skin, etc. I also wear a face mask whenever I go out and with the heat and humidity of where I live, it just becomes a skin nightmare. I just made another post about how I’ve changed up my skincare routine. Here is my makeup routine for covering it up. Add warmth and color back into the face. COLOURPOP - Super Shock Blush in Count Me In NUDESTIX - Nudies All Over Face Color Bronze + Glow in Terracotta Tan I find that when I’m breaking out, my face can tend to look flat and pale. By adding some warmth and color back into the face, you look healthier and more radiant which will help a lot at disguising breakouts. The colourpop blush is a beautiful mousse-y texture that gives sheer color with a satin-finish. The cream bronzer is my holy grail! It’s super creamy, long-lasting and looks just. like. skin. Spot-conceal. MAKE UP FOR EVER - Full Cover Concealer Wearing a full-coverage long-wear foundation just isn’t the way to go for me. It ends up looking cakey and accentuating texture instead of disguising it. As the individual breakouts are the only areas I really want to cover, I don’t want to cover the areas of my skin that are actually smooth and break-out free! This concealer is super high coverage, a little goes a long way and very long lasting. I will sometimes use a pinpoint eyeliner brush or even just my ring finger to pat the product exactly where I need it! This TRULY gives the illusion of smoother, clearer skin. Lock it in. rms beauty - Un" Powder I love this powder because of its super fine and silky texture. It makes my skin look 100% poreless which is perfect for smoothing out texture on my skin! It also keeps my T-zone area shine-free all day without drying out my skin (as many mattifying powders do to me).
Battle of the Face Masks
Battle of the Face Masks
My skin type is combo oily that can lean more dry during the weather changes or just randomly. My skin concerns are acne, oiliness throughout the day and also dehydration. I’ve ranked the face washes I currently have open right now based on how they worked for me personally (starting from favorite). My favorite out of this bunch is the philosophy - Purity Made Simple Pore Extractor Mask because can see a difference when I use the mask, but it’s nothing major especially for the price tag. . philosophy - Purity Made Simple Pore Extractor Mask Key Ingredients: Salicylic Acid (for acne and blackhead removal) and White Clay (removes dead and dry skin cells). Texture/Consistency: Cream with granules Scent: None Price: $18 for 1 oz / 30 mL (mini size) OR $35 for 2.5 oz / 75 mL Experience: I haven’t noticed much, if any, difference in my pores honestly. I do notice that my skin looks more radiant and glows after removing this mask because the abundant amount of granules give a nice exfoliation. Repurchase/Recommend: It’s nice, but nothing special and don’t think it’s worth the high price tag because it’s not on the face long. I’d rather put that money towards an actual exfoliator than a mask. . e.l.f. - Hydrating Bubble Mask Key Ingredients: Glycerin (for hydration and protection) Texture/Consistency: Gel that turns into bubbles Scent: Soapy Price: $14 for 1.69 oz / 50 g Experience: The sensation of the gel turning into bubbles tickles and can easily get out of control and get into your eyelashes. I don’t notice any difference in the hydration of my skin. It is easy to wash off, but the packaging is finicky and randomly decides to stop dispensing product and you have to keep pressing down until more comes out. It also requires quite a bit of product to fully coat the face so not sure how long it will last for. Repurchase/Recommend: No I didn’t notice any difference and the packaging is difficult. . FREEMAN - Matcha Ice Cream Melting Sugar Face Mask Key Ingredients: Matcha extract (helps clear pores) Texture/Consistency: Thick gel with gummy flakes Scent: Sweet Price: $3.99 for 1.18 fl oz / 3-4 uses Experience: This mask is so thick and difficult to remove off the face! It made me ever want to use it. I also didn’t notice any sort of difference after using this mask. The style packaging is really nice and convenient and you can definitely get more uses than the recommended. It also claims that the flakes dissolve, but they never did for me. Repurchase/Recommend: No, too difficult to remove and didn’t see any results.
Your Skin But Better In A Bottle!
Your Skin But Better In A Bottle!
Here’s a little background on my skin. She’s a high maintenance b*tch that likes to suck my bank account dry. Boujee on a budget it? 75% of the time for her that’s not the case. I hate her for it. I can’t stand that my skin looks so PERFECT when I applied Pat McGraths skin fetish foundation because this little bottle cost me $68 plus tax!😵 It looks so amazing that I bought two bottles: shade 5 a light neutral undertone for when I’m fair in the winter and shade 14 a medium neutral undertone when I’m the most sun kisssd in the summer. With these two bottles I’m also able to customize my shade when I’m in between shades during the year. Now to be honest I don’t wear makeup everyday. 90% of the time I’m bare faced. I usually put in makeup if I’m going somewhere special such as an event, on a date, feeling creative or when I need to remind myself that I’m still that b*tch. So I’m actually okay with spending a little more on a nice foundation because I know it’ll last me a long time and if it’s worth it. So the question is..is it worth it? For me YES! I bought her toward the end of summer 2019 and it has served me well through the changing NYC weather and my ever adjusting skin. Whether my skin was really dry or slightly oily the foundation sat on my skin perfectly throughout the day. It’s a nice medium coverage foundation that can be built up or sheered out depending on the look you’re going for. 1/2 to 3/4 or a pump is enough for me to get a sheer/light natural coverage where it looks like my skin just the imperfections have been discreetly masked. To get full glam coverage I can get away with one and a half pumps then not even a beauty mark in my face will peak through! In my profile picture was the first time I used the foundation and I really sheered it out because it was a hot summer day. That day I got a little oily in my t zone but the foundation lasted all day. I don’t really blot or powder because I like the dewy look on myself but also I don’t because I’m lazy and I forget and most of the time at the end of the day I genuinely don’t care haha! In my last picture that I added in this post was when I was feeling creative and really used a heavy hand to apply the foundation. In that post I DID NOT PHOTOSHOP OR BLUR MY SKIN!!!! All I did was adjust the lighting in light room and added a filter to make the three images to blend better. But I couldn’t believe how airbrushed my face came out. The proof is in the pudding. I think it shows how far you can go with this foundation.
HOW I FIGHT ACNE WITH MY SKINCARE ROUTINE
HOW I FIGHT ACNE WITH MY SKINCARE ROUTINE
Acne comes from so many different reasons. But generally there are a few tricks that really help to prevent and treat them. SALICYLIC ACID: PAULA'S CHOICE - Skin Perfecting 2% BHA (Salicylic Acid) Liquid Exfoliator Known for: combating whiteheads & blackheads by penetrating into the pores of the skin and unclogging them This exfoliating toner is amazing at preventing future breakouts because it’s so effective at unclogging pores and keeping them clear. My blackheads have also diminished so much since using this toner and I definitely can’t turn back. It’s quite strong so even I don’t use it every day and night. I’ll take it out only when I feel like my skin is getting congested (around 1-2x a week). AZELAIC ACID: PAULA'S CHOICE - 10% Azelaic Acid Booster Known for: gently exfoliating the surface and refining texture of the skin This is a great booster to mix in with moisturizer whenever I feel like my skin is breaking out a lot and very congested. It’s not super strong especially mixed into the last step of my skincare routine but definitely helps to smooth texture. RETINOL: SKINCEUTICALS - RETINOL 0.5 Retinol night cream Known for: speeding up our skin’s natural cell turnover to reveal newer and clearer skin I’ve used a retinol for more than a year now and I’ve seen the biggest improvement in my skin regarding breakouts and texture. I use it as the last step of my skincare routine every other day now and it’s just a great way to keep my skin healthy over the longterm. NIACINAMIDE: THE inkey LIST - Niacinamide Known for: helping to control oil production by renewing and restoring the surface of the skin against moisture loss Especially with living in a humid climate currently, my skin has been freaking out a lot. But this serum helps so much with promoting my skin to be balanced and self-regulating. My T-zone doesn’t get as oily but doesn’t feel dry either! SUNSCREEN: SKINCEUTICALS - Physical Fusion Uv Defense SPF 50 Okay sunscreen doesn’t DIRECTLY correlate with breakouts, although, there are definitely some that can cause breakouts for some people, mainly physical ones (so find one that doesn’t break you out)! This sunscreen doesn’t break me out and in fact helps with my skin durinf breakouts so much because it protects my skin from hyperpigmentation! The scarring that comes after a breakout can be just as annoying as the breakout itself but sunscreen helps so much to speed up the recovering and healing process! Do you have more tips for preventing breakouts to share?
My acne fighting duo for under $20
My acne fighting duo for under $20
Some acne honesty: Although these worked really well for me, they might not work for everyone. Your skin is unique and might react better to different products. It can be a really frustrating process, I totally get it! What worked for me was finding someone online who had a similar skin type and similar story when it came to acne. Just always remember to take it easy on yourself. Acne is normal and it doesn’t make you any less beautiful. My current skin situation: I currently have combination, acne prone skin. I had very clear skin for most of my life until I went off birth control over a year ago now. I tried almost everything to try and get rid of my acne, but it took months to find a solution. It was just earlier this year that I finally found a couple products that helped keep acne at bay! I barely gets zits anymore (bless) but when I do, it can be very discouraging. My skin scars very very easily and it takes at least a month to get rid of the scars left over from the acne. SO anytime I see a zit pop up, I reach for these two products which help me 1) get rid of that zit quickly and 2) minimize the potential for future acne scars. How I use these together: Benzagel - Acne Gel 5% (face wash version) I usually use this just at night time because I just do a water cleanse in the morning. But when I get a pimple, during the morning I’ll cover the zit with the face wash for about a minute then wash that off. Then I’ll proceed with the rest of my routine, but I’ll avoid using any vitamin c / spf on the pimple. And then this where I’ll add the.... COSRX - Cosrx Acne Pimple Master Patch When I have a zit I will wear one of these during the day and a new one at night. It’s a grossly satisfying product because once you take them off, you can see the amount of oils that it has pulled from the skin / zit (you’ll see a white blob on the patch). The effects: After just 24 hours, the zit will almost fully disappear when I use the two of these together. The spot will be so much smaller than it is when I let the acne heal itself and the scarring is minimal, if noticeable at all. Which is amazing considering my normal pimples almost always scar (even if I DONT pop them). The best part: You can get both of these products for less than $10 CAD!